My sister Kirsty and I began this little trend back at Hyrule's MB; turning the lyrics of ordinary songs into humerous Zelda spoof ones :) We did quite a few ourselves, and other people started to follow suit; with hilarious results! All you have to do, is take the lyrics of a popular (or unpopular) song, and change them around a bit, so that they have a relevence to something to do with Zelda. It's really easy and fun! Even I, who's rubbish at poetry in general, can do it! :)

Divine Comedy's "Frog Princess" Spoof - by Juliet A. Singleton

Link: I met a girl, she was a fish princess
I guess I ought to make it clear
I wasn't really bothered about her royal highness
Until she whispered my ear

Ruto: Oh why don't you love me
Do you think that I don't mind?
Cos I don't love anybody
Except you, my sweet Hero of Time


Link: I met a girl she had bright red hair
I should have left her well alone
But oh no, not me
I had to see if behind her face so fair
She wasn't quite as stupid as she seemed

Malon: Ya don't really love me
And I don't really mind
Cos I just like to sing all day
But still, give me a kiss, faerie boy


Link: I met a girl, she was a Hylian princess
And yes I do regret it bad
How was I to know that giving her my ocarina
Would turn me back into a.... kid!!

Zelda: I wonder if you love me
Because I really love you
But alas, we can't be together
You must go back, my wonderful Hero


Link: And now I'm rid of them I must confess
To thinking about what might have been
And I can visualise those crazy lasses
Beneath a shining... guillotine...

I don't really... love them
Well, maybe except Zelda
Cos I can't help being such a hot guy
I come and go through people's love lives

Divine Comedy's "Something For the Weekend" Spoof - by Juliet A. Singleton

Malon said, oh people think I'm stupid
I can't add up or say my alphabet
It's such an awful feeling, darling

Link said, oh Malon you're not stupid
People don't really think that
It's your imagination
And off the conversation, darling

Something in his head, told him to accept
That Malon was totally, utterly braindead
Something in his heart, told him to pretend
She was alright company for the weekend


Zelda said, I don't think Ganondorf's dead
I know because I heard him in my head
It's such an eerie feeling, darling

So Link said, oh Zelda don't be stupid
Get this into your sweet head
Ganondorf's well and truely gone
Because I defeated him and won, darling

Something in his head, told him to accept
That Zelda was totally, utterly obssessed
Something in his heart, told him to pretend
She was alright company for the weekend....


Why are all the girls I know
Either really dumb, or totally loco
Oh can't they see......
If they'd just act normal, say
Then I'd let them spend the rest of their days
With me......

Weekend, they're something for the weekend
They're something for the weekend
They're something for the weekend
They're something for the weekend
They're something for the weekend
They're something for the weekend
They're something for the weekend
They're something for the....

Link went down to Lon Lon Ranch
Jumped on Epona and fled the land
Riding hard through grass, sea and sand
He ended up in Calatia
Got married, had kids and lived for years.

---

Meatloaf's "Wasted Youth" Spoof: Zelda's Song - by Kirsty Singleton

I remember everything!
I remember every little thing as if it happened only yesterday
I was barely seventeen and I once killed a stalchild with my ocarina of time
I don't remember if it was a fairy ocarina or an ocarina of time
But I do remember that it had a heart of magic and a voice like a great fairy!
I don't remember if it was a fairy ocarina or an ocarina of time
But I do remember that it wasn't at all easy
It required the perfect combination of the correct notes
And the precise pitch from which to strike

The ocarina bled for a week afterward and the blood
Was dark and rich like wild berries
The blood of the ocarina was Deku Berry red
The ocarina bled for about a week afterward but it rung out beautifully
And I was able to play notes that I had never even heard before
So, I took my ocarina and I smashed it against the wall
I smashed it against the floor
I smashed it against the body of a lover in the market
I smashed it against the tomb of a po
I smashed it against Epona
Epona whinnied in pain, the ocarina howled in hate

And I ran up the stairs to the Temple of Time
Rarau and the Sages were sleeping in the moonlight
Slowly I opened the door, creeping in the shadows
Right up to the foot of Rarau's bed
I raised the ocarina high above my head
And just as I was about to bring the ocarina crashing down upon the centre of the bed
Rarau woke up screaming
"Stop! Wait a minute! Stop it girl! What do you think you're doing?
That's no way to treat a mystical musical instrument!"
And I said "God dammit Rarau! You know I respect you
but you've got a hell of a lot to learn about PMT!"

---

Richard O'Brien's "Time Warp" Spoof - by Kirsty Singleton

*Link walks into the Temple of Time, and catches sight of the Master Sword. He walks up to the pedestal and places his hands on the hilt of the sword, when suddenly, all seven sages materialise around him. Zelda steps forward. She pulls out her ocarina of time and begins to play a tune, Saria soon joins in on her fairy ocarina. Link looks around, and begins to pull the sword from the pedestal, Zelda and Saria still playing. A blue light surrounds him, a weird sensation going over him.*

Link: It's astounding.
Time is fleeting.
Madness takes its toll.
But listen closely,
Zelda: Not for very much longer!
Link: I've got to keep control.
I remember doing the Time Warp,
Drinking those moments when
The blackness would hit me!
Link + Zelda: And the void would be calling!
All sages: Let's do the Time Warp again!
Let's do the Time Warp again!

Rarau: It's just a jump to the left!
All sages: And then a step to the ri-hi-hight!
Rarau: With your hands on the hilt!
All sages: You bring your knees in tight!
But it's the hero's pull,
That really drives you insay-ya-ya-ane!
Let's do the Time Warp again!
Let's do the Time Warp again!

Ruto: It's so dreamy!
Oh, fantasy free me!
So you can't see me!
No, no not at all!
In another dimension!
With voyeuristic intention!
Well secluded, I see all!

Link: With a bit of a wrist flip! (pulls out the sword, holding it up high)
Zelda: You're into the time slip!
Link: And nothing can ever be the same! (Turns to Zelda)
Zelda: You're spaced out on sensation! (Lifting her eyes to the ceiling)
Link: Like you're under sedation!
All sages: Let's do the Time Warp again!
Let's do the Time Warp again!

Navi: Well I was flyin' 'cross the field (Flies from Link's pocket)
Just a having a think,
When a snake of a guy, he gave me an evil wink!
He shook-a me up, he took me by surprise!
He had a black Gerudo stallion and the devil's eye!s
He stared at me and I felt a change,
Time meant nothing, never would again!
All sages: Let's do the Time Warp again!
Let's do the Time Warp again!

Rarau: It's just a jump to the left!
All sages: And then a step to the right!
Rarau: With your hands on the hilt!
All sages: You bring your knees in tight!
But it's the hero's pull!
That really drives you insane!
Let's do the Time Warp again!
Let's do the Time Warp again!

*Link finds himself in an empty temple of time. No one is there. He looks at himself, puzzled. He's a kid!*

Link "Isn't this working the wrong way?"

No one replies. He shrugs, and walks from the temple, dragging the sword behind him.

Savage Garden's "To The Moon & Back" Spoof - by Sylvia

He's taking his time making up the reasons,
To justify all the weirdness inside,
Guess he knows from the odd motions and the look in their eyes,
Everyone's got a theory about the big and older different one.
They're saying, "I guess he got older when he went away, and that's why he
looks so different today,
but that doesn't mean we know who he is,"
But somewhere in a private place,
He packs his bags for his normal age,
And he's waiting for the right time to come,
And he'll go over there and think...

"I would go to 17 and back,
If you would, if you would recognize me,
Got a problem about missing 7 years of my life,
So will you recognize me?"

He can't remember a time when he was different,
If Kokiri were green he was color blind,
All his old friends, don't seem to know him,
And wonder why this big guy is around,
He's wondering, '"I'm Link, I know I am,
But the Kokiri don't seem to have the faith,
To believe me and that I am the little kid they knew."
So Link's gonna take a dive,
And push his memories into overdrive,
Send a signal that he's hanging all his past on the stars,
What a pleasent dream...

"I would go to 17 and back,
If you would, if you would recognize me,
Got a problem about missing 7 years of my life,
So will you recognize me?"

They're saying, "I guess he got older when he went away, and that's why he
looks so different today,
but that doesn't mean we know who he is,"
But somewhere in a private place,
He packs his bags for his normal age,
And he's waiting for the right time to come,
And he'll go over there and think...

"I would go to 17 and back,
If you would, if you would recognize me,
Got a problem about missing 7 years of my life,
So will you recognize me?"

Republica's "Ready To Go" Spoof - by Juliet A. Singleton

I've been, asleep
For seven odd whole years
I got, a test
A really big huge quest
Older, wiser
I 'll not be the one you hurt

It's a crack, I'm back
Yeah I'm standing on the rooftops shouting out
Ganon I'm ready to go
I'm back and ready to go
From the rooftops shouting out
Shouting out

You seem, too mean
I'll imprison you in another world
Red hair, unfair
You get what you deserve
You're deranged, insane
One thing you can never change

It's a crack, I'm back
Yeah I'm standing on the mountaintops shouting out
Ganon I'm ready to go
I'm back and ready to go
From the mountaintops shouting out

It's a crack, I'm back
Yeah I'm standing on the battlements fighting ya
Ganon I'm ready to go
I'm back and ready to go
From the battlements shouting out
Shouting out

Ready to go......

Bemused, confused
I'll not be the one you hurt, ya hurt, ya hurt, ya hurt, ya!

It's a crack, I'm back
Yeah I'm standing on the hilltops shouting out
Ganon I'm ready to go
I'm back and ready to go
From the hilltops shouting out

It's a crack, I'm back
Yeah I'm standing on the towertop fighting ya
Ganon I'm ready to go
I'm back and ready to go
From the towertop shouting out

It's a crack
Ganon I'm ready to go
Ganon I'm ready to go
Ganon I'm ready to go
Ganon I'm ready to go...........

Bryan Adams' "Can't Stop This Thing We Started" Spoof - by Juliet A. Singleton

You might say my feelings are in vain
Might even pretend its all a game
You might hide behind all your lies
But if you wanna stop me Princess - don't even try
I'm goin' one way - your way
I'm so in love with you - I won't ever give up on you

Now Zelda
I can't stop this thing we started
You gotta know it's right
I can't stop this course we've plotted

This thing called love we got it
Don't leave me all brokenhearted
I can't stop this thing we started - no way
I'm goin' your way!

You might pretend you don't see me about
Might even think I'm not devout
You can hide it and you can deny
But if you wanna stop me Princess - don't even try
I'm goin' one way - your way
I'm so in love with you - I won't ever give up on you

Now Zelda
I can't stop this thing we started
You gotta know it's right
I can't stop this course we've plotted

This thing called love we got it
Don't leave me all brokenhearted
I can't stop this thing we started - no way
I'm goin' your way!

Oh - why take it slow?
I gotta know
Cos nothing can stop - this thing that we got!

Oh yeah
I can't stop this thing we started
Yeah! You gotta know it's right
I can't stop this course we've plotted

This thing called love we got it
Don't leave me all brokenhearted
I can't stop it
I can't stop it!

Britney Spears' "Baby One More Time" Spoof - by Sylvia

:::Sung by Link.:::

Oh Ganon, Ganon,
How was I supposed to know
That something wasn't right in Hyrule
Oh Ganon, Ganon,
I shouldn't have let you break free,
And now you're back in sight again.

Show me,
What the hell you're doing,
Tell me Ganon,
'cause I need to know just right now

My heroness is gonna kill me,
eventually...
I must confess,
I still believe, still believe,
When you break free again,
I'm gonna lose my mind...
Don't break free, Ganon,
Not even one more time.

Oh Ganon, Ganon,
The reason I fight is you,
Boy I almost got blinded,
Oh ugly Ganon,
There's nothing I wouldn't do,
It's not like I planned it.

Show me,
What the hell you're doing,
Tell me Ganon,
'cause I need to know just right now.

My heroness is gonna kill me,
eventually...
I must confess,
I still believe, still believe,
When you break free again,
I'm gonna lose my mind...
Don't break free, Ganon,
Not even one more time.

Oh Ganon, Ganon,
How was I supposed to know?
Oh ugly Ganon,
I shouldn't have let you go,
I must confess,
That my heroness,
Is gonna kill me soon,
Don't you know I still believe,
That you will stay there,
So give me a sign,
Don't break free, not even one more time.

My heroness is gonna kill me,
eventually...
I must confess,
I still believe, still believe,
When you break free again,
I'm gonna lose my mind...
Don't break free, Ganon,
Not even one more time.

Go Back

This is an UNOFFICIAL site and is in no way supported by Nintendo. The Legend of Zelda, Link, Princess Zelda, Ganon and other related characters belong to Nintendo. The images and information on these pages are purely for entertainment value only.

 This page was created by Juliet A. Singleton © 1999. All rights reserved.