***
Despite the late hour, Ewan
knew his sister walked the corridors. In the still coldness of his bed he could
hear her paces, the whisper of her silken nightgown.
How
many nights has it been? Surely more than a week’s worth.
His candle was a beacon to
sleeplessness as he sat up, running a weary hand through disheveled hair. To
close his eyes was to submit to rest. In succumbing to that she would be
waiting. Bleeding her last into his arms, her gaze seeking
his for reassurance as she slipped away to the final darkness.
Leigh,
gods, why can’t you rest? Let me have a peaceful night just once.
The rhythm of her footsteps
continued, drawing close to his room before fading as she turned to stalk the
length of hallway only to return again a moment later. The Hyrulian prince shut
his eyes, rubbing at his pulsing temples. The first night Brianna had come
awake to traipse about he’d thought that Leigh had somehow come back. Warm
tears on his face, her name in his mouth, he had come awake to hear a soft
voice singing a quiet tune.
In the dark, Brianna sang.
He recognized it as
something their mother had used to sing them to sleep as babies; first for him
and then a few years after for her. Only the pair of them and their parents
knew of the melody, as well as the royal nursemaid. It had been something Impa
had used to soothe Zelda as a wee one and the queen in her turn had passed it
down.
Her soprano hummed it now,
filling the silent spaces with its gentle lilt. Ewan had not gone to confront
her that first night nor in the several after. Deep within he knew the reason
she could not sleep in the evenings.
He himself was the cause.
Anger and despair rippled
in his gut as he shoved aside the bed sheets and found the wash stand. Making a
cup of his hands, he raised water to his face as the haunted eyes of a man
beyond his years glared at him from his mirror.
I
had to kill Molasar. There wasn’t any other way. He would have taken over your
mind, Brianna. I did it for the best.
As he reached again to dash
weariness from his visage, his core ached and his limbs tingled. Death was
patient, watching him hawk-like, trailing his shadow. It had been close to its
prey but had been denied. He felt the scrape of its cold claws down his spine
and shuddered as his veins burned.
It
would have been easier that way, I guess.
He touched the edge of the
mirror with trembling fingers, looking into the stare of a young man he didn’t
want to know as himself.
If
I’d died then, Brianna wouldn’t have a reason to hate me. Leigh and I could be
together and—No. No, just stop thinking that way.
He gritted his teeth,
determined not to feel sorry for himself. There had been many people that had
already wallowed in sorrow for him. His mother still looked upon him with
nameless emotion in her eyes and his father regarded him as precious as
treasure.
Even
so, sometimes I think it’d be easier.
The traitorous thought
stabbed into him and his gaze wandered to his salvation.
The dagger he kept at his
bedside table winked an invite, knowing his wants and he tore his eyes away,
chest heaving.
I
should talk to Bri. Even if she does despise me, maybe I can find out what’s
wrong.
Soft moonlight reached to
touch his shoulders and flicker across his bare feet as he crossed the cold
stone floor. Cracking the door to his bedroom ajar, Ewan peered into the
corridor, the last light of the guttering tapers pooling ghastly across the
floors.
Her locks rippled with
their dying hues. Her back was to him, her pale hands slack at her sides. She
had come to pause at the end of the hall, the blue silks gathering to bunch at
her heels. The song continued, just as beautiful as he remembered from boyhood,
but with a marring sadness to its score.
Guilt and pity washed
through him and for a second he lost his resolve. Better to just slip back into
his room, back to bed, try to sleep in spite of what nightmares it would bring
and…
“Ewan?” The hushed
address made him startle. Suspicious, Princess Brianna stood tensely before her
elder brother, cool eyes seething into his being. “What are you doing up at
this hour?”
“I-I was going to ask you
the same thing,” he found his voice to reply. Stepping out into the hallway, he
was a full head-length taller than she, yet he felt so small by comparison. “I
was just concerned is all.”
“How nice.” Brianna’s tone
was neutral as she appraised him with a suddenly apathetic sweep of her eyes.
“I’m a big girl, Ewan, I can take
care of myself you know.”
Fifteen
years old and already she fancies herself a woman. The bitter sentence flashed through him and he
sighed, raising a hand to his rough chin.
“Like you took care of
yourself around Molasar?” he asked sharply, then
softened as a horrified pall settled in Brianna’s fair eyes. On another
exhalation, he added, “Look, Bri, I know I can’t undo what happened--.”
“Then why are you even
trying?” Rage caused her question to crack, glimmering tears stood welling,
wanting to spill over. “Nothing you say can do anything to help me, so just go
away!” Her dismissal rose sharply; soon she would be loud enough to wake the
castle.
Reaching out, Ewan placed
his hands on her shoulders, attempting to steady her.
“What I’m trying to say is,
I never meant to hurt you. You’re my sister and I love you. I didn’t want to
see anything happen to you. We’ve both been through a difficult time. We need…”
He felt his heart stop as memories of his beloved crashed back and he blinked
away his own hot tears. “We need to stay together and help one another, Bri.”
“Some help you are,” the
princess hissed, grabbing his wrists and digging her fingernails in. At Ewan’s
wince, she held on, driving them deeper. “You can’t even help yourself, crying
out and having nightmares all the time.”
Ewan felt the blood exit
his face to congeal somewhere in his toes. “Wh-What?”
It was a choke of shocked bewilderment. “Brianna, that’s not--.”
“Not the way it is?” she
finished, glowering spitefully into his eyes. Her tears hovered for an instant
before leaving warm tracks down the sides of her cheeks. “Yes, it is, I’ve
walked past and heard you every night. ‘Oh Leigh’ this and ‘Why won’t you come
back to me’ that!” Her words darkened, a gravelly mutter as she looked to her
own small, slipper-less feet. “You want to know
something? I’m glad she’s dead.”
Blood drummed like hoof
beats in his ears as he willed himself not to strike her. “Brianna.” Her name
in his mouth was poisonous. “You’re behaving like a spoiled fool. I know you’re
hurt but that’s no reason to say things like that. You didn’t know Leigh so you
have no right. Do you understand? None.” His fingers
tightened in the folds of his sister’s nightwear. She continued to look at her
feet, burning drops falling from her eyes.
“I d-don’t need this from
you!” she sniffed, gagging on the syllables. “You betrayed me when you killed
him. You didn’t know him, so of course I have every right!”
“How--.” Ewan was beyond
astonishment as he fought to maintain composure. “How could you say that? Do
you even know what he did, what he was planning to do?”
“He was planning on
marrying me and making me his queen. Finally making me a proper woman, and not just a cast-off from this throne if something
happened to you!”
The prince shook his head,
a low growl of frustration in his throat. “No. I’ll tell you what he was
planning to do. He had designs on marrying you and then having our kingdom as
well, taking it from Mother and Father! Tim and I both found that out. Bri, he
tried to kill me, do you understand that? Left me for dead!”
Hand met flesh in a blur. Pain
thrummed through Ewan’s features as Brianna’s slap pierced the stillness around
them. Blistering blood hurried to the spot and his eyes watered involuntarily.
As his own fingers crept up to fondle the bruised
skin, Brianna snarled, “Don’t you ever tell me lies like that again! I should
have figured you and Timothy Westley were plotting to lie, that’s all the pair
of you are good for!”
“Brianna!” His exclamation
met her back as she turned away, shoulders heaving with sobs. She vanished as a
shadow swallowed her. A minute later he heard the slam of her own bedroom door,
her wretched cries muffled from within her chambers.
Gods
damn it. He’s already brainwashed her. Rubbing at his sore cheek,
Ewan made the slow, torturous walk back to his room. Once inside, he crawled
into bed, pulling the sheets over his head and praying for rest to claim him
quickly.
It was nearly dawn by the
time he drifted into a dreamless slumber.
Fayette had chosen to take
her breakfast when most of the servants were trying to clear the breakfast
dishes away and prepare lunch. Oblivious to the hired help’s grumbling, the Sosarian lady began delicately buttering her toast,
reaching for the jam. A nearby maid shot daggers at her as the noblewoman
motioned for her not to take the platter of fruit back into the kitchens just
yet.
“Thank you, my dear,”
Fayette said sweetly as the maid picked up her skirts and hurried away in a
huff. “Peasants,” the redhead lamented to herself as she slathered a thick
helping of preserves on the bread.
How
ill-bred, not permitting a lady to take her food when it suits her. Well, what
else can I expect with Zelda as the queen? Hiring all sorts
of riff-raff. Wouldn’t see this happening in Sosaria,
not at all.
As fond recollections of
her home caused Fayette’s mind to wander, she caught the haggard figure of her
step-nephew in the corner of her eye. “Ewan, I almost didn’t see you, lurking
over there. Do come and have a seat, breakfast is getting chilled.”
A sigh accompanied the
prince dropping himself in the chair across from his mother’s step-sister. “Morning,
Aunt Faye,” he mumbled, looking on the verge of laying his head on the table.
“My goodness,
Ewan!
Is something amiss? Are you feeling all right?” Instantly concerned for his
welfare, Fayette pushed back her chair and started to rise. Ewan leaned his
chin in his hand and motioned for her to remain where she was. He didn’t wish
to be fussed over. Gods knew he’d had enough of that.
His step-aunt resettled
herself but with misgivings. “You look as though you’ve had a difficult night.
Oh, you poor dear. Tell me, do you need a healer?”
“No,” the young man refused
through a yawn. “Excuse me. But no. Just some bad
dreams, that’s it.” And an argument with
my charming, brainwashed sister.
Across his left cheek,
coupled with nicks where his razor had slipped, the bruise was a purple
reminder of the princess’s wrath. Fayette examined it with worry before she
folded her hands in her lap, making the choice not to ask after the contusion.
The ankh Leigh had given him dangled from his neck to touch the tabletop and in
an instant Fayette understood. Of course
the boy would try to seek the affections of another woman in his sorrow. It’s a
shame whoever it was rejected him so roughly.
“I know you miss her.” The
soft words brought Ewan’s morose expression to meet his aunt’s sympathetic one.
“Gods know you never forget about them, even if it’s been years since you’ve
lost them. Raymundo’s been gone since you and your cousins were little, but not
a day goes by where I don’t think of him.”
Ewan nodded, looking to the
food that was still out. His appetite was gone. “I know. It’s just difficult.
Leigh was…Well, I could sit here and write a book detailing all she meant to
me. But I can’t sit here all day every day and wish things had turned out
differently, I suppose.”
“That wouldn’t be healthy
for you, no.” Fayette reached across the table and gently took his hand in
hers. “The pain remains but it gets less over time. Your love for them does
not. All you can do, so I’ve found, is live your life the best you know how.
That’s what they would want. Not to say it’s not arduous. Gods know it was hard
to raise your cousins, but Ray would have had it no other way. I did my best.”
Removing a lace handkerchief from her lap, Fayette passed it to Ewan. “I’m
sorry you had to find out so young, darling.”
He did not realize droplets
were raining across his hands until the cloth met his fingertips. Taking it, he
felt foolish but wiped them away anyway. Clearing his throat, he gave the
handkerchief back and looked to his own lap, intertwining his fingers. “Sorry.”
“No, no, dear, it’s
perfectly all right. Better to allow it out than to keep it shut in to yourself.” Deciding not to embarrass him further, Fayette
looked past Ewan’s shoulder to the stairway beyond. “Where is your sister?
Isn’t she going to come down and have something to eat?”
The prince shifted
uncomfortably, not meeting his relative’s questioning eyes. “I don’t think so,
Aunt Faye, it was a long night for her too.”
Fayette nodded to herself,
red curls bobbing. “I see. Maybe you ought to go and speak to her? It seems you
have quite the influence over her. Even if she does take
after her mother in attitude.” A small frown worked Fayette’s lips and
Ewan felt a smile come to his. Even after his brush with death had brought his
mother and aunt together, he knew they would never be the best of friends.
“It’s a difficult situation, I’m
afraid. She’s coping with some heartbreak of her own and won’t listen to a word
I say.”
“Is she to that age already?”
Fayette looked to the ceiling with a wistful sigh. “Seems like only yesterday
when you all were babes. Did a young man spurn her affections?”
“Something like
that.” He could feel his features glow as he traced the patterns in the
tablecloth with a finger. “A young man she fancied passed away rather suddenly
recently and she’s not taking it well.” He dared not mention his part in
things.
He glanced up to see Fayette
shake her head, lips pressed together. “That poor child.
First you’re injured and then a sudden death in the kingdom? Perhaps we have a
criminal on our hands. Well, I’m sure the guard will catch up to him soon
enough. Even if Zelda pays them a little too much to loiter
about the castle grounds all day.”
“I’m sure they will,” Ewan said
with false confidence. “In the meantime I’m not sure how to act around Brianna
anymore. She’s behaving like a different person entirely.”
“Grief will do that,” Fayette
sighed. “Just be a willing ear if she needs it. But
you also need to take better care of yourself, Ewan. Do what you need to be
happy, no matter what.”
“Fayette!”
Ewan looked to the dining room entrance as his mother stalked in, bristling.
Zelda was dressed sumptuously as usual, but her demeanor suggested she had been
roused from bed early.
“Yes, sister?”
Fayette was saccharine as she turned to the queen, the picture of innocence.
Barely nodding a good morning to her son, the monarch stabbed an accusing
finger inches from the Sosarian’s nose. “Don’t you dare act all guiltless, I
know what you’re up to!”
“Which would be…?” Fayette
raised her teacup to her mouth, drinking calmly.
“You were snooping through my
jewelry while I was out again, weren’t you? I didn’t say you could borrow that
brooch, Link gave that to me for our last anniversary!”
Fayette’s chair upset as she
rose from it, looking Zelda squarely on. “I didn’t touch anything in your room,
why in the world would I bother when jewelry from Sosaria is much better made?”
Ewan rolled his eyes and slipped
from his seat, making a quick exit as the bickering continued. Plans were
forming quicksilver in his head.
Do what you need to be happy. No matter what.
All he needed was one last
confirmation.
****
He found her in the sitting room
before the hearth. Against the black intruding night the flames were a stark
golden. As he opened the door, he saw her stiffen. She was watching the fire
deliberately and said nothing as he entered.
“Bri?”
Ewan rested his hands on the back of her chair, looking down at the top of her
flaxen head. “Bri, I wanted to talk to you about last night.” It was difficult
to keep the resentment from his tone.
“I told you to go away, I have nothing to say to you.” Her answer rang with
finality as she made no effort to acknowledge him.
“Then you’re just going to have
to listen to what I have to say.” He came around to the front of the chair and
regarded her sternly. “I spoke to Aunt Faye this morning. She told me to do
what I must to be happy.”
“Oh, bravo, would you like some
applause?” Her hands began to work furiously on the embroidery she labored
over. “I don’t see why you came to tell me this, Ewan.”
“I wanted you to know what I
have planned,” he informed her, coolness coming into his utterance. “I’ve
decided that leaving here and traveling around for a bit would be best to clear
my mind. All that remains now is to tell Mother and Father.”
“And what of
the throne?” Brianna continued to stitch, her words casual. “Mother and
Daddy want you to take it once they step down, you know that.”
“I have no use for a throne in a
kingdom that has no use for me.” Her sibling’s response was stiff. “This is for
the better all the way round, Brianna. You can have the bloody throne, I don’t
want it.”
“Glad you can see that the
better of us belongs up there.” Brianna’s malevolence was thinly veiled. “The
last thing Hyrule needs is a coward as king, anyway. A
murderer. I could tell Mother and Daddy tomorrow, you know, or even
tonight. How their precious son is nothing better than a gutter rat, killing
innocent men.”
“It pleases me to know you
love me so, Bri. Molasar was as far from innocent as a man can be. Why can’t
you see that? Has he really got you so wound around his little finger, even
though he’s dead?”
“He’s dead only because you
killed him!” Outrage made her eyes into coals. “You took away any future we
could have had. I loved him!”
“Brianna, I know you did,
but it was necessary!” His protest rose above her cry. “You have no idea what
he was going to do!”
“Shut up!” The needle and
thread tumbled from her lap to hit the rug as she stood up, drawing herself to
her full height. “Your whore may have died, but at least I didn’t kill her.
More’s the pity to that!”
“Leigh was no whore!”
Before he realized what he had done, he had given her a rough shove. Brianna
tumbled back into her chair, expression smouldering.
“How dare you lay a hand on me!” she wailed.
“Wait until Mother finds out!”
It was like the rare fights
they’d had in childhood. The reflection lived briefly in his mind as he
stammered. “I-I, sorry. I didn’t mean to do that. But
you have to see, he wasn’t any good,” Ewan pleaded.
“He was better to me than
you are,” the princess returned, becoming piteous. “You don’t know how it
feels. Whenever I look at you, I see you killing him. See the look you got on
your face when you…And what he looked like on the ground, bleeding. Gone from me forever.”
“Bri…” Her tone plucked
what words he could have said from his throat.
“Just leave me, Ewan. Go
back to your room and lament on your own problems.” She did not move from her
chair as she looked to the fire, appearing so young and frail.
He approached her again and
before she could protest he had swept her into a tight embrace. “I’m sorry.
It’s all gone so wrong lately. All I can say is I’m sorry,” he whispered into
her ear, shutting his eyes.
“Ewan…” She relaxed in his
grip, burying her head in his shoulder. “I’m sorry too…”
For a span,
neither moved. It was as it had been and for that time Ewan could
forget the gruesome things he’d had to do.
Then he felt it. Sharp and
insistent, it pressed against his back, threatening to tear the fabric of his
tunic. His arms loosened. “Brianna, what…?”
“I’m sorry.” She leaned
back, smirking. Her expression was dream-like as she pressed the dagger she had
hidden in her sleeve closer to his flesh. “Sorry you didn’t die as well.”
His hand pushed her
shoulder, putting her off balance. Grabbing her wrist, he twisted it lightly
and her teeth gritted. “Let go of me Ewan!”
“No.” He continued to twist
until the weapon dropped from her hand. “What’s happened to you, Brianna?”
“I want him back. I’ll do
anything to be happy. If you can leave me all alone here, then I may as well be
the one to cause that loneliness.”
“If you kill me, you’ll go
to the dungeons, do you want that? You’ll spend the rest of your life there,
break our parents’ hearts, and there won’t be an heir. Answer me, do you want
that?”
“No.” The will to fight was
gone as he released her. Sinking to her knees, the princess made no effort to
take the knife up again. “I don’t understand where it all went wrong, why it
all had to go so badly.”
Her brother strode to the
door wearing the grim frown of finality. “I don’t know either.” But I sure wish for both our sakes it
hadn’t.
He disappeared into the
corridor, leaving her alone to her melancholy.
“You’re what?”
Queen Zelda looked with
wide green eyes to her eldest child.
“I’m leaving, Mother. Giving the throne to Brianna if she wants it. I-I can’t live
with things here anymore. I need to get out past these walls and see what’s out
there.”
“You can’t. It’s your
birthright to become the next king! Link, say something!”
Zelda turned to her husband, wringing her hands. “Tell him he can’t just do
this!”
“Calm down Zel. Son, I
remember what it’s like to be your age. Not to say that I was the crown prince
of Hyrule, but I had my fair share to put up with at your age.” Looking ages
older than Ewan remembered, the king of Hyrule slumped in his seat. Turning to
his wife, he laid a comforting hand on her shoulder, squeezing it. “I think it
might be good for him. He does need time to sort things out on his own and he’s
a man now. Able to make his own choices. Oh, Zel,
don’t cry.” As the queen buried her head on his shoulder, Link sighed. “It
doesn’t make us happy to see you go, Ewan, but we trust you. You’ll sort things
out and keep in touch, won’t you?”
“Of course, Father.” Ewan
swallowed the lump in his throat and didn’t meet his parents’ faces. “I
already…I have things I’ll need packed.”
Link nodded miserably. “All your
mother and I want is for you to be safe out there, all right?”
“Y-Yes.
I-I should be off now. I have servants carrying things out of my room for me as
we speak.”
Without waiting for his father
to answer, Ewan stood and went as quickly as was polite.
He heard his mother’s cries, but
he did not look back.
There was nothing for him at North Castle now.
The shadows blanketed him as
Ewan slung his pack over his shoulder. Struggling to make the rise on the hill
he climbed, he at last allowed himself a look back from the miles he’d walked.
In the distance, small as a
child’s toy and dim with distance were the towers of North Castle. His home. It would be about dinner time now. Or rather, he
told himself firmly, his former home. Ahead there stretched the roads to the
unknown, inviting him.
I’m sorry, everyone.
He recalled the notes he had
written to his parents and sister, tucking them under the pillows on their
beds. In each he told them of his love and promises to keep in contact. He
sighed, heart heavy. It was time to move on.
Turning again to the roads, he
walked on, vowing never to return.
****
The fire’s strength renewed.
Solitary in both her rage and the quiet room, Princess Brianna watched the bright flames lick at the parchment. If she
squinted, she could barely make out the words I’ll love you always becoming black as it was consumed.
One day I’ll make you pay, brother. You don’t know how badly you
wounded me when you killed my husband. Her cat-like smile grew as the last
of his note to her faded.
Don’t worry, Molasar, I’m always thinking of you. I’ll always be loyal.
Then, very softly, she started to hum the old
familiar lullaby.